The Chocolate War, Or Chocolate Is a Girl’s Best Friend.




If you read history, you probably know the story of Hernan Cortes, the conqueror of Mexico and destroyer of the Aztec Empire.  You’ve been told it was for the gold, souls for Christ and Spain.

Here is a different take on it.  Cortes has a girlfriend.  OK, big deal, most of us have had a girlfriend.  How many of us have a girlfriend who wants you to use the full force of your army to get what she wants?

Cortes’ girlfriend, Dona Marina, known as La Malinche, told Cortes that she wanted her own people conquered.

“They have something I want badly, mi amor.”

“The gold?  I want it too.”

“I want the gold, but there is also something more important than gold.”

“More important than gold?”

“Yes, bring your army to the capital and you shall see.”

Montezuma kept trying to buy off the men he thought were Gods.

“When the Spaniards arrived in the capital, Dona Marina did more than translate.  She went right up to Montezuma and said, “The chocolate or your life.”

Montezuma responded with a low rumbling chuckle.  “The so-called Gods have a concubine.  You and what army?”

Well, you know the rest.  The moral of the story?  Don’t get between a girl and her chocolate, the nectar of the Gods.



About tucsonmike

I am originally from Brooklyn, New York and now live in Tucson, Arizona. I have discovered a passion for writing. I have five books out now, with a sixth on the way. Take a look @ my book list: The Search for Livingstone An Affair of the Heart The Search for Otzi Griffith Justice in Space. Moriarty The Life and Times of a Criminal Genius Available now on Smashwords - Amazon and Barnes and Noble As to not bore my public with just "Buy my book," I am also interested in baseball, the outdoors, art, architecture, technology, the human mind and DNA. I learned Ashkenazi Jews, of which I am one, have to lowest rate of Alzheimer's in the world. Therefore, I treat my brain as a muscle needing a workout. I enjoy good food, flirtation, beautiful women (I am happily married for thirty years), so just flirting ;) I was considered autistic when I was young, trying to figure out if I have a mild form of Aspergers and learning from that. That is for future posts. You can also see I love history. Enjoy my sarcastic silly look at the world, and making History more interesting than a textbook.
This entry was posted in A Silly Look at The World, History Made Fun and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s