Lucky Malaysian Airlines. What if You Are Their Insurance Agent.


     Lucky is a sarcastic misnomer here.  I can’t even begin to fathom this.  two planes in four months. With the second plane, we know exactly what happened.  The women in my life refer to it as “Boys with Toys.”

     The first plane is just gone; like something out of a bad horror movie.  It’s probably at the bottom on the Indian Ocean, with no closure possible for the poor families.

     I know how to swim, but not at 16,000 feet, beneath the waves.  I enjoy eating fish and shellfish as much as the next person, but that is a bit deep.  (Sorry, being very tongue in cheek sarcastic today).

     The second plane, the thugs who shot it down are basically holding it hostage.  The loved ones know where their people lay and where they are finally being taken.

     It is time to weigh options and take care of business.

 

 

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Soccer World Cup Brazil Pele and Michael Palin


As the World Cup is in Brazil, I will translate this into Portuguese.  You will have to live with Google Translator for that and any Portuguese speakers can yell at me later.  :)   Soccer as it’s called in the United States and Canada, or Football in the rest of the world, is one of my favorite sports.  I was taken to soccer matches before I was taken to my first baseball game.  My father Marvin Charton and his Belfast born “partner in crime.” John J.J. McClarnon” took me to the games. Then came the New York Cosmos of the then North American Soccer League and a player, considered the Babe Ruth of soccer came out of retirement.  Edson Arantes do Nascimento but you may know his nickname, Pele.   My friend Saul Schlapik and I saw him play for the first time in the Summer of 1976, Bicentennial Summer.  The Cosmos still played their games in Yankee Stadium.  We watched Pele go around the entire opposing team and score. We saw several more games and were lucky enough to get tickets.  It was Pele’s day.  President Jimmy Carter spoke, but I forgot that until recently.

     I just finished Pele’s autobiography, Why Soccer Matters.  He wasn’t just the greatest soccer player ever, but he is an astute observer of Brazilian society.  Soccer is interwoven with Brazilian culture, you cannot separate the two.  He spoke about the infamous Cup Final loss, in 1950, when  Brazil, the host nation lost the cup final to small, neighboring Uruguay.  

     There was a lot of opposition in Brazil to even hosting the 2014 World Cup.  People felt the money spent was money hospitals and schools were not getting.  Whether Brazil gets an economic boost, the jury is still out.  

     I enjoyed watching the tournament.  I am proud of the United States team.  I have to  congratulate Germany for winning the cup. 

      As the tournament began, I watched Michael Palin’s latest travel series, Brazil.  As a Monty Python fan, I’ve followed Mr. Palin for four decades.  I always enjoy his travel insights

     With the World Cup, Pete, and Michael Palin, I developed some insight into Brazil.  Not sure if I would visit, but I enjoyed the insight.

 

Como a Copa do Mundo é no Brasil, eu vou traduzir isso em Português. Você vai ter que viver com o Google Tradutor para isso e quaisquer falantes de português pode gritar comigo mais tarde. :) Futebol, como é chamado nos Estados Unidos e Canadá, ou futebol no resto do mundo, é um dos meus esportes favoritos. Fui levado para partidas de futebol antes, fui levado para o meu primeiro jogo de beisebol. Meu pai Marvin Charton e sua Belfast nascido “parceiro no crime”. John J.J. McClarnon “me levou para os jogos. Então veio o New York Cosmos do então North American Soccer League e um jogador, considerado o Babe Ruth de futebol saiu da aposentadoria. Edson Arantes do Nascimento, mas você pode saber seu apelido, Pele. My amigo Saul Schlapik e eu o vi jogar pela primeira vez no verão de 1976, o bicentenário de verão. The Cosmos ainda jogou seus jogos no Yankee Stadium. Nós assistimos Pelé sair por aí toda a equipe adversária e marcar. vimos vários outros jogos e foram a sorte de conseguir bilhetes. era dia de Pele. presidente Jimmy Carter falou, mas eu esqueci que até recentemente.

      Acabei de terminar a autobiografia de Pelé, por que é importante de futebol. Ele não era apenas o maior jogador de futebol de sempre, mas ele é um observador astuto da sociedade brasileira. Futebol está entrelaçada com a cultura brasileira, você não pode separar os dois. Ele falou sobre o infame perda Cup Final, em 1950, quando o Brasil, o país anfitrião perdeu a final da Taça de pequeno, vizinho Uruguai.

      Houve muita oposição no Brasil até mesmo sediar a Copa do Mundo de 2014. As pessoas sentiam o dinheiro gasto foi dinheiro hospitais e escolas não estavam recebendo. Se o Brasil ganha um impulso econômico, o júri é ainda para fora.

      Eu gostava de assistir o torneio. Estou orgulhoso da equipe dos Estados Unidos. Tenho de felicitar Alemanha para ganhar a taça.

       À medida que o torneio começou, eu assisti mais recente série de viagens de Michael Palin, Brasil. Como um fã de Monty Python, eu segui o Sr. Palin durante quatro décadas. Eu sempre gostei de suas idéias de viagens

      Com a Copa do Mundo, Pete, e Michael Palin, eu desenvolvi algumas dicas sobre o Brasil. Não tenho certeza se eu gostaria de visitar, mas eu gostei do insight.

 

 

 

 

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Culture Shock: The 2014 FIFA World Cup as Experienced by an American Expat in Germany


Culture Shock: The 2014 FIFA World Cup as Experienced by an American Expat in Germany.

 

Congrats to Germany!

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Moose


     I got the idea from a sign I saw on Facebook, of a Canadian road sign about hitting moose.  I’ve had my views of moose.  

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     I have to start with Bullwinkle, that lovable, dopey sidekick or Rocky in the cartoon.  You will learn Moose are not like that in real life.  The only other funny, silly thing about moose was from the song, Moose Moose, I love a Moose.

      My father in law as a boy of twelve had to run away from a moose.  His uncle owned a camp in Maine, and my father in law was only able to escape because he could run through thickets where the moose couldn’t chase him.

 

     Three weeks after I moved to Boston, there was a news story.  A moose wandered into Downtown Lowell, 25 miles Northwest of Boston.  This is a highly populated area.  Fish and Game shot a dart into the moose.  It was tranquilized and they started to tie it up, when the moose woke up.  Oops.  They finally got it under control two hours later and the moose was moved to Northern Vermont.  End of story, right?  

     No, it wasn’t.  Several weeks later the moose was back in the news.  A Volkswagen Beetle hit the moose, killing the moose and the driver.  The car looked like an accordion, hence the need for such signs,  

      My buddy George Tully, better known as Numbskull Number Two (I am one, but that is another story) and I were driving through Maine at dusk.  “It would be interesting to see a moose now.”

“George, if we see a moose now, it will be the last thing we see.”

 

The signs warning you about moose are needed.

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Review of Monty Python Live (Mostly) and Meet and Greet


tucsonmike:

Monty Python, ah.

Originally posted on Breise! Breise! Extra! Extra!:

Members of Monty Python at the "Meet and Greet" after the O2 show Monty Python Live (Mostly) on July 5th. (Picture by Loretto Leary)

Members of Monty Python at the “Meet and Greet” after the O2 show Monty Python Live (Mostly) on July 5th. (Picture by Loretto Leary)

You’d have to have a heart of stone not to find most of the jokes, songs and skits of the Monty Python Live (Mostly) performance at the O2 arena in London funny.

True fans, like myself, will laugh heartily at what we have now heard at least fifty times if not more.

I own Monty Python Sings, actually I bought it twice: on cassette and later on CD. I own all the Monty Python’s Flying Circus shows on DVD and all of their movies. Not alone that, but I also bought all of Michael Palin’s Travels on DVD, Terry Jones’ history DVD’s and John Cleese’s Fawlty Towers, in addition to A Fish Called Wanda. I have their official biography as well as unofficial stuff.

Am I…

View original 376 more words

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British Invasion


     Tonight, I had the Tom Hanks series The Sixties on.  I was watching the episode about the British Invasion.

     I was a young kid when it all happened.  It’s always fascinating to watch the crazy girls screaming.

     Because, I have a sarcastic wise guy sense of humor, I decided to play with the idea of a British Invasion.  Because I think all of us need the two S’s Sarcasm and Satire.

     Think about it.  The kids were among the first Baby Boomers.  I wonder what percentage of their Dad’s fought in World War II.  

     Can you imagine a concert with all sorts of British groups.

     The screaming seventeen year old approaches her father.  “Dad, I want to go to the British Invasion Concert.”

     He looks askance at her.  “British invasion?  We stopped that nonsense with Paul Revere.  I put my life on the line and helped to save their bacon in the war.  British invasion indeed.”

     Then, you get the standard teenage cry, “Dad!  You know nothing about the future and what my generation will do.”

     “Why don’t you start with your homework, young lady?”

     Stamps her feet.  “Dad, there having all the cool British groups.”

     Dad is shaking his crew cut head at cool in this context.

     “Well, I remember the British being cool and reserved.”

      The daughter is anything BUT cool (at least by temperature).  “Daddy, you have to let me go, all the major groups are coming.”

     Dad is losing patience with his princess.  “I only have to do what is right for you, young lady.  I make those decisions, not you.”  Dad is a little curious though.  

     “What are the names, of these groups?”  (Gangs are more what go through his mind.  Dad’s a cop).

     “The main ones are called the Beatles.:”

     Dad can only think of the Japanese beetles wrecking his garden.  “You reminded me, I need bug killer to get rid of the Japanese Beetles in the garden.  Always knew I didn’t like nothin’ Japanese.  Fought them in the damn war.”

     The daughter is wide eyed, thinking her father plans to murder the Beatles when they arrive.  “Dad, but they are so great.  They are gonna be on Ed Sullivan tonight.”

     “Don’t believe it!  Mr. Sullivan would never allow such foolishness.”

     “Oh and Dad, other groups are coming too.  There are the Rolling Stones, The Who, the Animals and the Dave Clark Five.”

     Now Dad is wide eyed.  ‘If you see Rolling Boulders, I mean Stones, it means avalanche and you run.  I dealt with those fighting in the mountains in Italy.  If you’re smart, young lady, you’ll run.  As for the Who, well who are they?  The Animals aren’t getting near my little girl.  The Dave Clark Five?  You know I restrict your dating, but five of them?   That does it.  I’m calling my friend in customs!”

     Dad gets on the phone and calls his friend.  He’s ashen faced when he gets off.  His daughter is still standing still obeying instructions.

     “The Japanese Beetles really are gonna be on Ed Sullivan.  This I gotta see.”

     “Oh Dad, Beatles, BEATLES.”

     “Is that what they teach you in school nowadays?  Spelling really HAS gone by the wayside.  Kinda like new math.  What the hell are they teachin’ you kids anyway?   You certainly don’t have permission to go out with them.  Animals, Dave Clark Five indeed.”

      His daughter figured telling Dad about her boyfriend, Johnny Palermo was probably not a good idea at the moment.

     Ed Sullivan came on and the screaming for the Beatles began immediately.  The daughter started screaming.  Mom just looked on and smiled, only saying about the Beatles they were cute.

     “They need haircuts, and all that screaming, what for?”  Dad could only grumble under his breath or the women in the house turned on him.  Dad kept shooting looks at the picture of his son in his Marines uniform.  “Thank God Tommy ain’t here to see this spectacle,” Dad muttered again.

      When, the Ed Sullivan show ended, Dad looked over at his daughter and said crossly, “You think you’re going to any of those concerts, think again.”

      “Dad, I’m going.  Johnny already has tickets.”

      Mom smiled, Dad went deeper into cop interrogation mode.  

     “Who’s Johnny?”

     Before their daughter could answer, Mom answered for her.  “While you’ve been riding around in your patrol car, Eileen’s been seeing a boy in her school and by the way I like him.”

      “I need Johnny’s last name so I can look him up.”

      “It’s Palermo,”  his daughter smiled.

      Dad’s face went many shades of red.  “I fought Italians in the war!  My baby dating one of them?  I forbid it!  You break it off.”

     Mom stared him down.  “You’ll do no such thing.   I like him.”

     “No daughter of mine is gonna be Mrs. Palermo!”  Dad snapped.

 

      And now the punch line.  “Tommy, since you are already angry I have something else to tell you.   The British invasion is just the beginning.  The British musicians spoke about getting many of their musical ideas from Blues and Rhythm and Blues.  Stock up on cold cuts, because Eileen and I are not going to be here over the summer.”

     
     “Where are you gonna be.”

     “Alabama and Mississippi.  The British singers got Eileen and now me interested in helping these poor people gain their rights.”

     Dad may be slower than most cops, but light dawned on marble head eventually.

    “So the British invaders like Nigger music?  I wanna know why I can’t arrest them for corrupting morals.”

     “Because you can’t Daddy.  The world is changing.” 

     

 

      

     

 

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The New Gaza Parking Lot חניה החדשה בעזה في موقف للسيارات الجديدة غزة


     Welcome to the new Gaza Parking Lot.  The Parking Authority welcomes you to our secure safe lot.

      Where are all the people you ask?  Well because of Hamas never learning and firing rockets into Israel, the only thing Israel could to was level it, especially Gaza City.

      Look at divided Austria and Germany after World War II.  There were some in the American government, including Robert Morgenthau who tried to get President Roosevelt to push for multiple German states like the old principalities.  

     Gaza should just be made a farming and fishing community with the Israeli military and urban planners planning the new Gaza.  No tall buildings, nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.  Sorry, the song from Martha and the Vandellas just popped into my head; I apologize for the diversion.

 

      Then, there is the parking lot.  Hamas asked for this, because they couldn’t behave in a civilized manner.  This is the only way Israel will be safe from them.

     Criticism?  Israel has that now.  They might as well do it anyway.  The so called left wing, only likes Jews as victims.  They are also too blind and thick in the head to realize, the groups they are defending, would turn on them in a heartbeat.  

     So welcome to the new safe, secure Gaza Parking Lot.  Your valets and security, will keep your vehicle safe.

 

     

مرحبا بكم في موقف سيارات جديدة لوط غزة. السلطة وقوف السيارات ترحب بكم في موقعنا الكثير آمنة آمنة.

       أين هي كل الناس تسأل؟ كذلك بسبب حماس أبدا التعلم واطلاق الصواريخ على اسرائيل، وكان الشيء الوحيد الذي يمكن لإسرائيل المستوى، وخصوصا مدينة غزة.

       ننظر إلى تقسيم ألمانيا والنمسا بعد الحرب العالمية الثانية. هناك البعض في الحكومة الأميركية، بما في ذلك روبرت مورغنثاو الذين حاولوا الحصول الرئيس روزفلت لدفع الولايات الألمانية متعددة مثل إمارات القديمة.

      غزة ينبغي أن يكون مجرد إجراء المجتمع الزراعي وصيد الأسماك مع الجيش الإسرائيلي ومخططي المدن تخطيط جديدة في غزة. لا البنايات الشاهقة، ومكان للتشغيل، لا مكان للاختباء. آسف، والأغنية من مارثا وVandellas برزت للتو في رأسي؛ اعتذر عن التسريب.

 

       ثم، هناك موقف للسيارات. حماس طلبت لهذا، لأنهم لا يمكن أن تتصرف بطريقة حضارية. هذا هو السبيل الوحيد إسرائيل ستكون آمنة منها.

      النقد؟ إسرائيل لديها ذلك الآن. لأنها قد تفعل كذلك على أية حال. ما يسمى الجناح الأيسر، ويحب اليهود فقط كضحايا. بل هي أيضا أعمى جدا وسميكة في الرأس لتحقيق، والجماعات التي يدافعون عنها، من شأنه أن يحول عليها في ضربات القلب.

      ونرحب بذلك إلى الجديد سليمة وآمنة موقف للسيارات غزة. الخدم والأمان، وسوف تبقى سيارتك آمنة.

 

ברוכים הבאים לחניה עזה החדשה.רשות החנייה מברכת אותך להרבה הבטוח והמאובטח שלנו.

       איפה כל האנשים שאתה שואל? ובכן, כי החמאס לא לומד וירי רקטות לעבר ישראל, הדבר היחיד שישראל יכולה הייתה לרמתו, במיוחד בעיר עזה.

       תראה אוסטריה מחולקת וגרמניה לאחר מלחמת העולם השנייה. היו שם כמה בממשל האמריקאי, בם רוברט מורגנטאו, שניסה לשכנע את הנשיא רוזוולט לדחוף למדינות גרמנים מרובות כמו הנסיכויות הישנות.

      עזה צריכה רק להיעשות קהילה חקלאית ודיג עם הצבא הישראלי ומתכנני ערים מתכננים עזה החדשה. אין בניינים גבוהים, לאן לברוח, איפה להסתתר. מצטער, שיר ממרתה וVandellas פשוט קפץ לי לראש; אני מתנצל על הסחת הדעת.

 

       לאחר מכן, יש מגרש חניה. חמאס ביקש את זה, כי הם לא יכולים להתנהג בצורה תרבותית. זוהי הדרך היחידה שישראל תהיה בטוחה מהם.

      ביקורת? לישראל יש את זה עכשיו. הם יכולים גם לעשות את זה בכל מקרה. בצד השמאל מה שנקרא, רק אוהב יהודים כקורבנות. הם גם עיוורים מדי ועבים בראשו כדי להבין, הקבוצות שהם בהגנה, היינו מדליקות אותם בתוך לב.

      אז ברוכים הבאים למגרש החדש והבטוח עזה חניה. המשרתים והביטחון שלך, ישאירו את הרכב שלך בטוחים.

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